she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I think my moral compass just broke
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