Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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