How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
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of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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