What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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