he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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