I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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