you guys were way drunker than both of me
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
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