I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
