So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
