I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize