I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
