Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
this beer tastes like vomit already
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
