Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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