it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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