I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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