The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
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I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
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Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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