How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
this will be a night to untag.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
