Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
