i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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