Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
