I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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