Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
