i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
