His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
