please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
