I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
