also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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