How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
