ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
