My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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