absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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