i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
