I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
