It's like God shit irony all over that family
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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