Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I puked a lego.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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