i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
found the other keg... it's in the tree
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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