We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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