You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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