I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
