she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
