I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize