From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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