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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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