Texts From Last Night

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  (631): View more from New York

  Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?

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  (631): Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach? http://tfl.nu/iba6
  Replies (10) Good night (1332) Bad night (514)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum

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  (503): Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum http://tfl.nu/wrcg
  Replies (26) Good night (4586) Bad night (536)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions

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  (318): This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions http://tfl.nu/jkxb
  Replies (27) Good night (762) Bad night (4072)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.

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  (585): Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night. http://tfl.nu/iu2u
  Replies (33) Good night (3769) Bad night (1177)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.

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  (541): Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends. http://tfl.nu/3u3d
  Replies (19) Good night (3823) Bad night (621)
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  (619): View more from California

  after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.

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  (619): after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible. http://tfl.nu/hzvs
  Replies (18) Good night (6860) Bad night (697)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.

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  (303): It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes. http://tfl.nu/06hp
  Replies (36) Good night (859) Bad night (9643)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.

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  (270): she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah. http://tfl.nu/1uyt
  Replies (30) Good night (9600) Bad night (1175)
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  (818): View more from California

  ...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.

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  (818): ...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread. http://tfl.nu/b6oj
  Replies (11) Good night (2588) Bad night (829)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.

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  (503): I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else. http://tfl.nu/cpkz
  Replies (11) Good night (3476) Bad night (589)
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  (909): View more from California

  I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not

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  (909): I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not http://tfl.nu/br11
  Replies (10) Good night (1477) Bad night (664)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!

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  (509): It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me! http://tfl.nu/u8n7
  Replies (2) Good night (1160) Bad night (490)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man

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  (248): Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man http://tfl.nu/pjf5
  Replies (0) Good night (283) Bad night (761)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.

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  (484): True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper. http://tfl.nu/q818
  Replies (0) Good night (573) Bad night (214)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"

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  (518): I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories" http://tfl.nu/in2x
  Replies (5) Good night (527) Bad night (291)

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