whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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