Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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