im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
