If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize