it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I need a burrito and a hug.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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