How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
