I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize