I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
